eighteen years old. eighteen. one eight. a legal adult. old enough to know, but too young to care. how did this happen. i feel like i went straight from turning 16, to now being 18 without even blinking an eye. i can now buy dry ice. my friends can now use me as the legal adult when they want to have friends over and their parents aren’t home. i can vote. i can get a tattoo. i can legally gamble. it’s like this new world has opened up to me where i can do things on my own. birthdays usually don’t affect me that much, but this one hit me hard. i suddenly feel like i have all of this responsibility to grow up. lucky for me, i still have my senior year of high school. i feel like in a way i’ve been blessed with this extra year of childhood where i get to continue figuring out who i am before i’m thrown into the world. i don’t want to waste the extra year i’ve been granted. as i live this next chapter in my life, i want to continue to learn more lessons in every aspect of my life. i am a firm believer that everything we do teaches us a lesson; these lessons stick with us, and it’s our choice what we want to do with them. i want to live by mine. i want to take mine wholeheartedly and let them teach me things i didn’t realize i needed to be taught: how to love, how to grow, how to be strong. i also want to show the rest of you how important these lessons are. sometimes it’s hard for us to see the lessons, but they’re always there. it doesn’t matter if you’re old, young, going through a breakup, dying your hair, or living the happiest day of your life; something will always come out of it. while i wait to see what lessons i gain from the wonderful new age of 18, here’s my reflection of the lessons i’ve learned from my not legal adult ages.

LESSON 1: DON’T WASTE YOUR LIFE AWAY

time goes by so quickly! life can laugh in our faces as it passes us by and we would never notice. my friend bailey told me one night when we were talking that we never listen to the seniors who say “high school goes by quickly” until suddenly we are the seniors in high school. i don’t want to waste anymore of my life sitting in a basement. i want to be going on scooter rides down the canyon trail. i want to have as many bonfires with my friends as i can before it’s too late. in a year, we’ll all be saying goodbye to each other. we’ll have different lives, and i don’t want to feel shorted on time with the people in my life now. i want to experience everything i possibly can even if it’s small. i want to be able to say “oh yeah i’ve tried that!” to everything or try it until i can say it. some of you might think that’s impossible, but why should it be? is it so bad to be optimistic about what you can accomplish? i know we all have our sad days, or even just our lazy days where we don’t want to get out of bed. and that’s perfectly okay! stay in bed and binge watch vampire diaries for the sixth time (i really hope i’m not the only one who’s done this), but don’t let it consume your life. don’t let it make you feel worse or unaccomplished. take the days you need to rest, then go experience life. even if it’s something as simple as going on a walk. nature is so healing, and one of the greatest examples of time passing.

LESSON 2: SEND IT

i’m sure many of you have heard this statement before, mostly in the form of “full send”. it might sound cheesy when i say this is one of the greatest sayings to live by, but it’s true. “send it szn” was my instagram bio all of summer 2019, and my friends and i lived by that statement as if it came directly from the bible. scared to jump off of the biggest cliff? send it. want to text your crush? send it. drive up the mountain and swim in a pond at 11 at night? send it. spend way too much money on salted caramel m&ms in the airport? SEND IT. i still push myself to send it in everything i do because what’s the harm? sure my crush might leave me on read, or i might break my tailbone jumping off of the cliff (which both happened), but i grew stronger from it. flying across the world to europe on a broken tailbone can really change a person.

LESSON 3: SELF LOVE ISN’T SELFISH

it’s okay to put yourself first sometimes. self love is so important! something i struggled with this past year with putting too much of my energy into other people who didn’t return it. if you take away anything from this post, let it be this: you cannot pour from an empty cup. no matter how hard you try, it’s not possible. take time for yourself! it’s not selfish to give your body and soul the attention it deserves. exfoliate your skin, buy an outfit, read your zodiac for the day. do whatever you need to do to refresh your beautiful self. (i want to do a blog post that goes more into depth on this. i’ve been obsessed. let me know if you want it).

LESSON 4: MAKE DECISIONS

… this one hasn’t happened yet. i am the most indecisive person you will ever meet in your entire life. just ask my poor friends who have to put up with me when i won’t decide where we eat, or if we should turn left or right. hopefully i’ll be more decisive in the future.

LESSON 5: DON’T LOOK BACK IN ANGER

this one is so important. we all make choices and mistakes that we might regret, but we can’t let our regrets hold us back. it happened, it’s in the past, and now there is nothing you can do about it. so why let it affect you? if you hold onto anger from the past you will never be able to move forward with happiness. anger and hate are such strong, evil emotions that can bring us so much harm. let it go. don’t let it in. realize what you can do better next time, and move forward. take whatever love you can find out of the situation, hold onto that, and let the rest go.

now that you’ve read about my lessons, get out there find your own. just like we each have our own paths, we each have our own list of lessons.

love you all,

iz